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Writer's pictureWayne Gough

The military cosplayer of the year


This poem was inspired when i saw a social media page with a load of ex vets ripping apart a bunch of fake soliders, referring to them as Walts, walter mitty type charactures , one chap in particular had a SAS beret with a iron cross medel.

Oh Walter just take a look at you

Oh Walter what are we to do

Peddling patriotic power and fear

The military cosplayer of the year


Like a bragging locker room jock

Boasting about sex you just never got

Wearing medals for wars you never won

Seeing the whole darn lie come undone


Pissed up and pissed off in equal measure

Dressed up for the war built only for leisure

Marching with the brotherhood of ham

Proudly displaying the iron cross for Uncle Sam


Relationships smashed under your tender fist.

She wasn’t asking for it but you couldn’t quite resist.

Your The kind of man a war would take away

But when war never happened you left her anyway.


Oh Walter, Walter take a look at you

Your badge is upside down, your beret is askew.

You look at Churchill’s statue and wipe away a tear

The military cosplayer of the year.

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